The newspapers and political blogs are already full of rumours and recommendations about a possible shadow cabinet reshuffle now that Ed Miliband has a free hand and isn’t bound by the ridiculous shadow cabinet elections. This is my contribution to the speculation, red stays in, blue is out as they doing more to help the Tories than us:

Leader of the Labour Party | Ed Miliband

Yes, I’d keep him, even though it was a truly dire speech.

Deputy Leader and Shadow Secretary of State for International Development | Harriet Harman

We need Harriet because she’s the only one with experience of being in the shadow cabinet before 1997, but she’s never one that impressed me – last on my list for the deputy leadership elections.

Shadow Chancellor | Ed Balls

Love him, or loath him you can’t deny that Ed is doing a cracking job, let’s leave him be.

Shadow Foreign Secretary | Douglas Alexander

He used to be one of Labour’s rising stars. Dumping him, would open up one of the four senior posts for someone who actually has talent.

Shadow Chief Whip | Rosie Winterton

Doing a good job, so let’s keep her in post.

Shadow Home Secretary and Minister for Women and Equalities | Yvette Cooper MP

She’s already in one of the four most senior posts, so the only place she could go is to replace Ed (M that is, not the hubby). Ed had better up his game, because she has.

Shadow Chief Secretary | Angela Eagle

So she’s doing one of the four most important jobs. You’d never know. Bye Angela.

Shadow Secretary of State for Business, Innovation & Skills | John Denham

Sorry John, this is a vital post as growing the economy is what will get us out of the mess, but I’m not hearing anything worthwhile from you.

Cabinet Office and Minister for the Olympics | Tessa Jowell

Sorry Tessa, heard you at the Progress rally and you used all the right words about a need for a new politics and trust. Problem is it didn’t sound like you actually understood them, it’s no good just trotting out buzz words.

Shadow Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government | Caroline Flint

Why is the speculation targeting Caroline? She’s doing a great job and is Labour’s best hope for helping us to come up with and sell some radical new ideas for local government – because we certainly need to dramatically shake up the status quo, but not always in the ways that the Tories want to.

Shadow Secretary of State for Culture, Media & Sport | Ivan Lewis

Hard one this. I like Ivan and think he’s doing a reasonable job, but his conference speech was dire and his idea for licensing journalists just bonkers. Sorry Ivan, you’re the only one I’d be sad to get rid of, but we need the space.

Shadow Leader of the House of Commons | Hilary Benn

Come on Ed, give the man a chance. He’s ace on radio interviews, so why don’t you deploy him more?

Shadow Secretary of State for Defence | Jim Murphy

Fairly neutral on Jim, but there are enough others that need to go so there is space for Jim to stay.

Shadow Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs | Mary Creagh

Got off to a very slow start and could have been better on the whole forest sale issue, but has now well and truly got into her stride and is doing a great job,

Shadow Secretary of State for Education and Election Coordinator | Andy Burnham

Good performance all year and absolutely brilliant conference speech. Only possible reason for not promoting Andy is that he is so good at education which is vitally important. But there are others that could do that job, let’s get Andy into Shadow Foreign Secretary to give Hague a run for his money, which Douglas is failing spectacularly to do.

Disclaimer – not just saying that as Andy’s a friend, believe me it’s true!

Shadow Lord Chancellor, Secretary of State for Justice | Sadiq Khan

Another one I’m neutral about, so Sadiq can stay.

Shadow Secretary of State for Energy and Climate Change | Meg Hillier

Meg, Meg this is important. The coalition is terrible. Shame your response is. Bye.

Shadow Secretary of State for Health | John Healey

This is a hard one. I’m usually impressed by John, but he’s been pretty weak so far on health. Let’s keep him in, but moved to something less important.

Shadow Secretary of State for Northern Ireland | Shaun Woodward

Neutral again so Shaun can stay as he’s been good in the past and perhaps can be again.

Shadow Secretary of State for Scotland | Ann McKechin

Ann who? Bye.

Shadow Secretary of State for Transport | Maria Eagle

Transport is important and Maria’s not making the grade. Bye.

Shadow Secretary of State for Wales | Peter Hain

Peter impressed me in the deputy leadership elections so he can stay.

Shadow Secretary of State for Work & Pensions | Liam Byrne

Doing a good job, but let’s move him as I think that a new entrant would be good in this post.

Space for new blood

I’ve managed to find space for eight new faces, so these are some of my suggestions:

Rachel Reeves – great job as a junior DWP shadow, so let’s put her in the big seat and give Liam something else.

Chuka Umunna – heard him give a great speach at the FSB fringe. Since I want to get rid of John Denham, let’s give Chuka a promotion in the same shadow department he’s already in.

John Woodcock – a rising star that isn’t talked about enough. Let’s get him out of the junior shadow transport job and into the hot seat to replace Maria.

Gerry Sutcliffe – we don’t want too many very new faces and Gerry is a seasoned performer who’ll bring some gravitas to the shadow front bench, but will also seem new as he’s relatively unknown.

Michael Dugher – could make a good attack dog and we need one.

Gloria De Piero – hasn’t shone yet like all of the others I name, but has potential.

Don’t know enough about the rest of the possibilities, so can’t make any more suggestions.

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